Revisions... Finally!

Finally, after several months, I’m working on the revisions for SONL.  I should have been done with all of them by now and working on my query letter and synopsis to send off to agents and publishers.  This is one story I just know is going to be well received by practically anyone.  For one thing, the story line is far better than Black Friday and more than just the furry community will like it.

There’s action , humor, and suspense, and a tiny smidgen of romance (not with the leading characters), and sadly, death.  This book has two of the secondary chars biting the bullet, literally.

Basically, what I’m doing is putting to use some of what I’ve learned from the books on writing I’ve received.  I’m working on Chapter seven, it needed some work and padding for the scenes to make better sense.  Then!  Then I’ll go through chapter eight and make it so Sabrina isn’t giving away her past too easily.  Jason doesn’t need to know everything, just a few things.

Keeping this one short.  It’s 11:30 and I need some beauty (yeah right) sleep to get through work tomorrow.

Long Running Comet for Saturday

Even though I get off early on Saturdays now, I am still posting this late at night.  I can honestly say I am doing things before writing my posts, but not all of it writing related.  I’m sure some of you can guess what I was doing.

I have looked at Way of the Comet recently and thought about the last post I had written about it.  I mentioned in it a creature that definitely a creation of my own and not mainstream at all.  Dungeons & Dragons doesn’t have a blip on this creature anywhere in its many books and sites.

It was even mentioned in one of the excerpts I posted; the kiyrie.

What is this creature you ask?

A kiyrie is a feline-like winged  creature capable of some shape changing and magic.  It wasn’t an animal that evolved like others.  Its very base form, the feline, was created by the spirit of the Earth when it finally became conscious and alive.  All the other creatures came from somewhere else and evolved over time, they weren’t true creations of the Earth.

The spirit of the Earth took bits from different wild cats and a few other creatures to form the first kiyrie (pronounced kee-EYE-ree).  At the time, it was simply a feline looking creature capable of a small amount of magic.  When Bast found it, she demanded that it be destroyed because other creations have tried to destroy the planet and they just got things back to a more natural state.  The short story of it is, the Earth said no and hid her creation.  Bast finds it.  They argue and the first kiyrie is cursed into being only simple wild animals for eternity.  The Earth, in a fit, makes a work around for her creature so they are able to shift between anthro and feral forms, but if they stay in their feral forms for too long, they will forget themselves and stay feral until they die.  Cue a few Fate planned acts and they eventually gain wings, more magic, ad develop their own society.  That’s the long and short of it.  I have stories of each ‘evolution’ they’ve gone through to get where they are in current Haven history.

In Way of the Comet, they make an appearance when Larana is captured by the enemy and force shifted so they can keep her caged for their own nefarious deeds.  The griffon she speaks to in the camp is a kiyrie that has lost many of his memories from being in one form too long.  Thanks to the higher functioning griffon mind, he hasn’t lost all, just a good part until he is forced to shift again into a feral state.  Then, he may be lost forever.

Now, the kiyrie, whether trapped in a different form other than their original or free, they probably won’t play a big part in the story itself.  They may give Larana some insights and a stepping stone to get her closer to her goal before it’s too late.

For now, she needs to get out of her cage and it looks like she may have to convince Hawk to help her and organize the rest of the beasts so they can escape.  Slavery is a bad thing and she does not like being sold and stolen.  Which could prove to be an interesting scene or two before the cavalry arrives.  I know there’s going to be a very mad lion to deal with the canines of that camp.

The ideas are coming to get through this block, but so far, nothing is really coming together enough to be solid and good for the story.  We’ll see what happens when I finally move this story closer to the top of the list.  Who knows, the muse just may decide to focus on this story for a while after I finish revisions on others.

Late Furry Friday

Sorry this post comes late, but I wasn’t able to get in and settle to write anything until late last night (Friday).  Work has me leaving at 7PM and fortunately, mom was wanting some all you can eat fish; which I was craving as well.  We did go out for dinner, but wouldn’t you know it, they ran out of the hand battered fish for the all you can eat at 6:30 so we had to make do with something else from the menu.  We’re such huge regulars at this place that we didn’t mind and had a good dinner while we playfully teased our server and the night manager.

Because we are regulars at Village Inn, they proved how well they know us by getting our drink orders without asking.  All they did was make sure of what Colin wanted.  He changes it up with each visit but his drinks are usually one of three things.  His normal meal has also changed but they took it in stride and made it extra special good for him.

I love our normal server at Village Inn.  While she does keep up a professional attitude, she’s funny, vibrant, and willing to go that extra mile, like bringing my mom and me a pitcher of unsweet tea to refill our glasses.  We drink that much tea when we’re there.  She also puts a couple extra lemons in knowing we love lemon in our tea.  She’s taken the time to memorize our usual orders, including Dave who doesn’t come in as much as mom and I do.

It’s people like her that I put into my stories.  Though the main character I associate with her is in another book (being written right now), I keep certain aspects of her for others stories, like the young druid in one of the short stories in my erotica compilation.  The kitsune she’s seeking is based on someone I knew as a child and someone I know online now whose character this fox is based on.

I’ve encountered a block on the story with the druid and kitsune.  He’s supposed to be playing tricks on her while she follows his trail.  Along the way, it’ll be him that falls for her.  She, Leofa, won’t be in love with him, but she will be infatuated.  Her heart belongs to the Nature goddess who currently remains unnamed so their relationship won’t go the same way as others have in this set.

Another story will take things in reverse, in a way.  I haven’t thought of a working title for it, yet.  This one has the dragon/elf taurs. (I know, very difficult to imagine let alone conceive)  This story will start off with the sex scene then the couple will have to deal with the consequences of it when they reach their new home and wait to be paired with their future ‘mates’.  It won’t go well for them socially, but they will stay together even though they’re community will try to force them apart.

I’m still thinking of other stories to add into this compilation to make a total of ten.  I was thinking of doing a story with my elf character Jade.  She’s younger, a little more naive and trying to forget the bloodshed and lost comrades in a war between two tribal kingdoms she fought in.  This would be the story where she meets to one man who stole her heart and helped her heal emotionally from the war and find a new home among the folca in the high mountains.  It could be an interesting story if bittersweet in its own way.  When she married, she was still considered young by elf standards.

I don’t know.  We’ll see how the muse dances when I finally finish revisions on SoNL.  That one is my primary focus for now.

Tuesday’s Society Thoughts #urbanfiction #fiction #fantasy #amwriting #edit

I’m going to keep this rather short this week.  Due to a change in my work hours, trying to write a normal post takes more effort than I can give.  I may go in to work later, but that also means I don’t get home until later which makes everything else done later.  These posts come too close to bedtime for the time being.

Yes, I know I can write them as soon as I log in, but I have my habit set and changing that will take time.  So will adjusting to these later hours.

I need to make SoNL my obsession if I am to get anything at all done with the editing and revising process.  It needs to be the only thing I think about when I’m not thinking about my son and the bills I need to pay.

Thanks to a friend of mine over on FA, I have a way to bring more clarity to my characters.  Not just in Society of Night and Lies, but in all my stories.  This includes my cliché ridden novel in progress, Way of the Comet.  It’s quite simple, too.

What I found is one of those meme things you see traveling around the internet.  In the furry fandom, they do a lot of traveling; some more than others.  This one is a bit long, but it asks for details to give someone a good picture of what their personality is like.  The characters I’ll be using it on first will be in SoNL.  They need the most clarification; most especially Sabrina and Jason.

Though it isn’t seen now, they will build a relationship that goes beyond friendship, but not before they see it ripped to shreds in book two, and built back up and flourishing in book three once Jason realizes a few things.  There is a lot of time passing between the three books in which I’ll be doing all of this.

Between book one and book two, there will be a year or two.  Between book two and three, about eight years or so and things have changed as far as their personal relationship goes and how she is seen by her boss (Mindy’s husband) and others.

With this meme, I’ll interview each character.  I may post Sabrina, Jason, and Mindy’s completed memes.  But then again, you all may get to see each of these characters.  Dean, the main antagonist, you’ll love to hate as much as I so.  With Gerin, the man who took Sabrina in, gave her an education and encouraged her to do her best in everything, including killing, you may feel some pity for him, but then again, you may dislike him for the same reasons Sabrina does.

Have you found ways to make your characters seem more real?

Progress on Society

No, not today’s society.  No one wants to listen to my opinions on the atrocious degradation of today’s society.  We’ll save that for a very special post on another blog that few will ever see.  Nah, the society in question tonight is Society of Night and Lies.  (Honestly, I still need to come up with a book title. That’s the trilogy title.)

Since the weekend I have pondered how I should re-write chapter eight.  This chapter is Sabrina tells her past to Jason.  For a while I have asked myself ‘Why would she be telling anyone that much about her past?  That wasn’t what he was wanting to know.’  Then, last night, while I am letting my mind relax by playing a few rounds of Jewels Legend in bed and the idea comes to me.  Instead of totally re-writing this chapter, change it so there are internal thoughts which will tell the reader the how and why, but have her only give the more pertinent information in the dialog of their conversation.

Sabrina has kept her past a secret for a while.  There’s no real need to blab about it to someone she’s only known part of that time.  Sure, she trusts Jason, but she isn’t sure where his allegiances lie because the Claw and Fang want him dead and they want her to do the deed.  For all she knows, he could be working for another, similar, group and she has been targeted by them.  While possible, nothing has been said about it in the past and he’s acting pretty secretive as well.

There’s a twist to add into the story.  I’ll have to think about that while I go over chapter eight.

Which brings me to something else.  I need to download and re-read the short stories the creator of this world and owner/player of the character Jason Foxworth (who is a totally awesome guy, good looking and very talented).   He will be getting the main mention when it comes time to publish.  This is his world and I’m only borrowing it for this trilogy.  I’m just glad he’s allowing me to use it and publish.

Back to the original topic…

This will definitely work this chapter, but I’ll have to see if it’ll work for the others where she’s going on about her past.  Only this one has any real information that useful. The rest, I think, can be cut down to a paragraph or two and worked into the ongoing story.

Be honest, does this sound like a workable solution to prevent a lot of re-writing?

On a side note, tomorrow, the 9th, is my 41st birthday.  It’s amazing I managed to live this long without something going horribly wrong considering the accidents I’ve had in youth.  So, if there’s no post tomorrow, you now know why.

Week in Editing #amwriting #writemotivation #fiction #edit #sonl

It has been a busy week.  This past weekend was rather lazy except for the work I did on my Sunday post.  That post was an accomplishment in itself.  I turned two paragraphs into a page, maybe a page and a half, which sounds and definitely works better with the scene.

But, because of that huge revision of the scene, what is now chapter eight will become part of chapter seven.  It continues the conversation, but it’s being shortened from three or four pages down to a page or so.  If Sabrina is part of a secret society, or once was, she wouldn’t be divulging quite so much information, even to someone she considers a friend.  Mindy, her best friend in the Society, even though she doesn’t fully trust her at this point, knows all about what is going on.  Actually, she knows more, but I didn’t say that.

I offer this comparison for everyone.  First, the original two paragraphs:

“You follow me, drug me, twice, and now have me captive. I’m not sure I can trust you, right now, Sabrina, but…” and he let the pause linger while he chose his words very carefully, “… since I don’t have much of a choice, I’ll listen then decide later if I believe you or not.”

With a nod, Sabrina said, “That is all I ask. So that you fully understand why I am doing what I’m doing, I’ll start at the very beginning. It all began during the Great War, when I was just a little girl of about eight years or so…”

Now, the link to the revised conversation; http://candacegauger.wordpress.com/2012/10/21/sunday-excerpt-excerpt-amwriting-fiction-sonl/.  To get the full conversation (most of it anyway) you can find it at this link; http://candacegauger.wordpress.com/2012/10/14/.

These are set to open in another window so you can see and compare better.

To me, the revision sounds better.  Jason isn’t giving in too easily and Sabrina doesn’t sound like a pushover.  She is given a bit more attitude and shows she cares for him as a friend and wants to see him live.  It also shows she’ll do what she needs to do to make sure he understands.

I can sum up the current chapter for the curious.  It tells about Sabrina’s youth at the end of the Great War, how she lost all but her cousin Shyleah, and entered the Claw and Fang where she learned to be an assassin before meetings her various beaus.

The first draft had her with seven boyfriends; some which became husbands if briefly.  That’s way too much for such a young lady who doesn’t have a sex fetish or anything  Sabrina is a proper lady in many ways.  The seven were trimmed down to three which were spaced further apart to give her ‘healing time’.

There’s no way she’d talk that much.  She’d keep it short and to the point and give Jason just enough information, plus let him know of the characters he needs to worry about other than his twin brother, Devin.  Which reminds me, I need to make a small revision to add a talk with Gerin where he tells her the particulars of her mission to get her cousin back alive.

There’s a lot to add and change in the next to last draft.  If I can get a few people in my NaNo group to do a full edit to point out areas needing further work and suggestions to tighten and polish it up, I’ll be ready to start querying agents.  (That’s next year at the earliest.  March, I hope)

Mid-week Review

Not much to review this time.  I haven’t done any writing or editing since my last post.  I have been either too tired to focus, in too much pain, or just too irritated with the day to be able to write anything coherent unless I want to write a rant.  Rants aren’t good things to post unless they are for a specific forum.  Although, they usually make one feel better after they are written.  Usually.

I have been trying to figure ways to promote not just my book, Black Friday, but also myself.  With so many works in progress waiting to be completed and edited, I need to drum up some excitement from people other than myself.  I want to share these works with the world and prove that not everyone in the furry fandom are perverts.

What I have found are a few blogs who are willing to interview indie authors and help showcase their work.  Sounds interesting.  I am signing up for a couple and we’ll see how things go.  I just hope I don’t make myself sound like a goofball or completely insane.

Some may know me well enough by now that I am eccentric, strange, weird, but rather harmless overall.  I may come off as repetitive and annoying, for that I apologize.  I don’t realize it until well after that fact.  Social?  Not really.  Would anyone believe that just going to work everyday is difficult?   I’d rather be someplace quiet and with fewer people at any given time.  Slow days are a godsend to me.

Enough about that.  You’ll see more when these interviews happen.  They will be a couple of months in the future.  I still need to find ways to promote myself around Tulsa and Oklahoma in general so that maybe I can start selling more books.  My sales are so low, they may as well be non-existent and I have no spare money to use the Xlibris sales and promotions.

Would anyone be willing to donate if I started a Kickstarter to raise the funds needed?  I’ve debated it just to afford the revisions and edits and even paying a couple of people I know to read Black Friday to point out those areas and suggest corrections or revisions. I’m talking, copy, like, and content edits to really make it shine.  The reviews I had on it said they liked the story, but the typos and other small errors detracted.

I’m rather looking toward BNC and another in my local group since their advice has been such a huge help with the first chapter of SoNL.  I’ll handle the cover art which needs some tweaking.  A bit of shading so you can see the creature on the front.  For those who have seen it here you can see it could use some work, but not a whole lot.

Volunteers are welcome if you want to see Black Friday improve or even help with Society of Night and Lies.  Comment, email, or even send me a tweet.  I’ll respond as soon as I can.

How about y’all?  Your week been going well?  I hope your writing and editing has been going better than mine.

Icky Week #writemotivation check-in

It has been a bad week for me this week.  Started Monday with a sore throat and a mild case of laryngitis and fell from there..  This virus knocked me down, literally, for the majority of this week.  Just when I thought I could go back to work, it knocked me for another loop which required a doctor.

Because I’ve been out for more than three days, Wal-Mart demands I do the paperwork for a medical leave of absence.  What the hell?  Colds and minor cases of the flu can keep someone out for a week, minimum, and they know this.  But, only three days before needinga FMLA leave of absence form.  Someone, somewhere, has no concept of reality.

More than a week, okay, I can see it.  But more than three days?  No.  But, if I want to work, I have to do it.  *huge sigh*

But, yeah, that’s my week.  I’m filling out the paperwork tonight and running it to the clinic tomorrow for the doc to fill out.  Nausea will not keep me from working for long.  Especially with medication to help.

But, this makes my #writemotivation check-in easy to do.  I haven’t had the energy or the mental capacity to remotely consider writing or editing.  I can say I’ve had ideas for a story I don’t intend to publish except on certain sites.

I‘m in the set up scenes, introducing the characters who’ll be participating and showing their personalities before starting it off.  Let’s just say that this story is one which will make most people want to un-watch and unfriend me if they read it.  That is why I am only posting it in certain places because I know the audience very well.

But, I can say one thing for my goals this month.  I did finish reading Scene and Structure.  It gave a lot of good advice on how to bring scenes together through cause and effect.  This is definitely one book I need for my library.

That is a hint for Christmas/birthday gift.  *cute kitten eyes begging*

Last, but not least, before the worst of my illness hit, I managed to create a page on Facebook that will feature my current published book and the works in progress.

Fantastic Furry Realms  

It still needs a lot of work and for me to update more often, but this has been up for only a week… barely.  Some of you have seen it already.  The rest of you, come by and have a look.  Like it if you want and definitely comment.  I’m proud of just this little bit.

Do watch that page.  Slowly, as I get help and advice, the cover photo will change to help support my main book, Black Friday.